#100 d o w n f a l l

I'm sorry dad,
I'm sorry for pointing fingers at you,
while it's just your pure intention,
to help me succeed,
and I'm just a failure beyond saving,
like the sun sunking.

I'm sorry mum,
I'm sorry for blaming you,
being the reason to my unanswered prayers.
In which actually, I never give you what you needed.

I'm so sorry.
I haven't been a good son.
Not even a slightest.
Clock ticks, but still no love I could possibly give.
Never listen. And never be where I'm supposed to be.

I'm sorry sisters.
I'm so sorry for not being able to be a great protector to both of you.
For being enabler.
For being unjust.
And not able to show my love.

I'm sorry brother.
I'm so sorry I haven't been able to connect.
I'm so sorry for leaving you alone in depression.
I'm sorry for not being able to make any moment together.
And thinking about you only once a year.

I'm sorry friends.
I'm so sorry for being the worst you all ever had.
So sorry for being the last to come but first to leave.
I don't want to turn my back, but I might soon.
I'm sorry I might cut all the ties.
I'm sorry for all my betrayals.

I'm sorry love.
I'm so sorry love.
I'm so sorry for being the deadweight.
I'm sorry for having gigantic ego and proud of it.
As long as I can, I want to spend my time with you.
But like open wounds, that's who I am, you gonna keep being hurt by me.

Lastly.

I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry.
You've been in difficult times, all 'cause of my bad decisions. Too much hesitations.
You're a bright star, in cluster of Sagittarius.
You should've been an adventure but, because of me you've been caged.
I thought it was a dream come true,
but it's an illusion, made you delusional.

Now you fall hard.
You can't adjust to the ground you fall.

I am the reason for your hardest downfall.
I am the reason for my greatest downfall.

I'm sorry, my dearself.

I've failed the kid in you.